Dating is an opportunity to Get out and socialize. Have an open mind! Stop screening everyone as a potential and likely candidate for the perfect mate and start enjoying people and experiences for the pleasure of them. Start living and being present with the people whom you meet rather than mentally calculating the likelihood that they are the happily ever after you so desire.
If you practice the art of living today and enjoying this moment, you will begin to realize that your life is more rewarding and fulfilling than you realized. Why? Because you are happily living it.
Enjoy a glass of wine or a cup of coffee with someone for the simple pleasure of learning about their life. This is much more real than watching a television show or reading a novel. A date is simply an experience in your life. Often times, however, a second date is worthy and even a third before you can absolutely determine that the potential for a long term relationship is even an option.
When you first meet someone, are you completely comfortable and open? Does it take a while before the real you shines through? Is it possible that the same is true for others? You can’t make a decision after only a first date. Establish a 3 date rule and stick to this and you will be surprised at the results. There are reasons for the 3 date rule which I will cover in another entry.
At the very least on a date you have the opportunity for practicing conversation skills, sharing stories, learning about other people, confirming what you enjoy about another person and how they relate with you, clarifying what you don’t necessarily want – which is an opportunity for further clarification on what you do want. When you eliminate the pressure of a date having to hold a greater purpose or meaning, you are more relaxed and allow more of your true essence to be revealed.
When I was dating for the simple pleasure of meeting new people, I had far more fun. At some point along the way, I realize I was doing the mental scan of potentiality. With each and every man I met, I took in a multitude of information in a blink wondering if possibly, he was the one. I became ever more selective in accepting dates. I enjoyed dating less, and was disappointed more. Thankfully, I caught on to my ways.
This prompted an internal investigation of my motives. and a quest for my own personal truth in what a relationship meant to me. Here is what I discovered. I met many interesting men, and to this day have some great friendships as a result of being receptive to dating. I did not go out with every man who asked me, or every man I met. I did have an idea of what was acceptable and not for me.
I used the information from these experiences and observations in creating my Attraction Recipe for my ideal partner. So it was easy for me to recognize him when he showed up.