We look up paid books and get dating tips from successful people’s speeches. You may have spent a lot of money, but this may not be for you. You can listen to my advice.
Just remember before we start though – you shouldn’t generalize when it comes to women. Every woman is different and each woman should be treated as an individual.
Any theory about how to treat women can only be a general guideline and not a rigid road-map to success.
Let Her Talk About Herself
We live in an age of equality but that does not mean that you can treat your date like a buddy you are watching a game with. Women love good manners and the more you display, the more she will respect you.
Let her talk about herself as much as you talk about yourself. Let her know that what interests her also interests you as you and your date need to have things in common.
But don’t expect to have identical tastes – that will be like dating yourself. If she’s interested in things you know nothing about, be honest about it and ask her to tell you more. She will love it. Pretending to be an expert where you are not will expose you as a fraud.
Create That First Impression
Don’t kill the relationship before it has a chance to get started. Your first date is not like turning up to a party … make sure you are on time or just a few minutes late. Don’t be early – that is just a little desperate.
And if you are going to be more than a few minutes late, give her a quick call to let her know you are not standing her up – it’s just common courtesy. Something like “hey, I was caught in a late meeting and will be 15 minutes late”. Being late will create the impression that you are not taking the date seriously. Once she thinks that, she won’t take you seriously.
Some Old Fashioned Values
To bring flowers or not? Fifty years ago it was mandatory. These days the jury is out on this one. If you are middle-aged and dating in small town, then flowers might be a nice touch. Flowers for a 20-something dating a modern woman? Probably not a great idea.
It might show you are interested, or it could just just be an awkward moment. If you don’t know her that well yet, leave the flowers for a second or third date.
What all women do enjoy though is a man with a sense of humor. Do your best to make your date laugh and smile. If you feel comfortable, even tease her a little to create some sexual tension. This one takes a little practice but can yield some great results. Many men attempt to impress women by talking about their jobs – that’s a great way to bore her. Just tell her what you do and stop there.
If she is interested in what you do, she will ask more. If not, talking about it will just bore her and she will lose interest.
To start with, keep you answers short and to the point without making it appear that you are trying to hide something. And be truthful about what you do. Don’t lie to impress her.
No one is perfect and you WILL screw up at times, but that is part of the learning curve.
Dating with your heart is a good start.